And Now A Word From Our Sponsors

The whole are-we-moving-or-not thing is still in the air; we should know for sure by Sunday night. So in the mean time, we're still going through everything and picking out things we want to sell/donate/throw away. At least then if it turns out we are moving, all we have to do is pack, because all the junk will be out of the way. Turns out I have a lot of junk, too, haha. Not a ton, but enough that I might be able to consolidate two bookshelves. Which is pretty big for me, given the amount of books, binders, and notebooks I have. There'll be even MORE room when I can finally get rid of my philosophy books.


...I forgot what my purpose in writing this was. (Go figure.)


Oh! I remember now. And it's tied into some other really exciting news for me. Excellent.


So I went to the Bible study group closest to my house on Wednesday, and it was amazing. The people are great, the leader is awesome (he's also the pastor of my church), and I had a blast diving into the Word and hearing other people's input and responses. It's definitely the one I want to stick with. :) Unfortunately, I think I left my Bible and my journal at their house! :( I realized they were missing the next day when I was going to do my quiet time; I couldn't find them anywhere in the house and they weren't in the car. It's day 2 without my Bible and journal, and it turns out I'm actually kind of having withdrawals from that daily routine, even though it's only been "daily" for a month, haha.


Thankfully - and I do thank God for this - my missing Bible and journal has not hindered me from continuing to spend time with Him daily. In fact, He used one of the books I bought a while back (Dream Language) to speak into my heart and give me a massive breakthrough in my spiritual walk. I've always been one for the rules, someone who wants to know what the expectations are so at least I'll know when I'm not doing things right. That mindset has had some deep and long-lasting ramifications, but one of them, which God showed me yesterday, is a spirit of slavery to my own efforts. I was reading about one of the authors' dreams about spiritual warfare and read these words: "You don't go head-to-head with the enemy. You recognize that you are nobody and then you simply exalt Jesus."


My mind was totally blown. I was speechless. I couldn't believe it. I couldn't believe how I'd missed that. God used those words to tell me that I don't have to anything. I don't have to fight all these battles with myself and other forces around me! It doesn't have to be me!! Indeed, it can't be me; I'm sure I'll know this on a deeper level later on in life, but I know that we are powerless to do anything the Spirit does not enable us to do and give us the power to do.


The feeling of freedom was so incredible! I was weeping for joy and speaking aloud praises to my King. For the first time ever, I wanted to run down the streets proclaiming the good news of freedom. Then I thought, what would I say as I ran down the street, hollering with joy and looking like a loony? I sat down to write down the words in my heart; I had no journal, so I wrote on pads of paper, ripping them off as I flew through them. When my mom saw the stack later, she thought they were Bible verses I'd written down. Indeed, the language of praise used in the Bible has long since seeped into my own. Here is part of what I wrote, filled with joy and praise:


"Glory to God in the highest, the Lord Almighty, who, being perfectly holy and righteous and just, sent His one and only Son to die in our place so that we can enter His throne room and give glory to God! His love for us is immeasurable; He grafts us into the covenant of His chosen people and adopts us as His own! He shows no partiality; He honors the ones who honor Him. He uses the poor, the weak, the unwanted, the nobodies of this world to bring about His will so that no one can boast except in Him! He prepares the soil of our hearts, if we will let Him. And in His perfect timing, He will cause them to bloom with beauty we never could have imagined. Even in silence You listen and love! You are always in control, even when all seems silent.


My father - my King - I don't have enough words or even enough brain cells to adequately praise your name and glorify you for all the wonders and miracles you have done in my life and across time! What's not to love about you? Heaven and earth adore you! And I join them. My Creator, you are amazing beyond compare, beyond description! What can I do but worship you!! ..."


Enthralled and excited by the freedom I felt, I wanted to look up verses that spoke of our freedom in Christ. Lacking my Bible's concordance, I turned to the internet (thank you, God, for the internet!) and ran a keyword search. I found some beautiful verses. One of them I sent out in a mass text: "It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery!" (Gal. 5:1, exclamation mark mine). Two others I wrote down for myself. One is 2 Corinthians 3:17 - "Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." The other is Galatians 3:14 - "He redeemed us in order that the blessing given to Abraham might come to the Gentiles through Christ Jesus, so that by faith we might receive the promise of the Spirit."


On Google+, I posted a segment of the above praises and, after some deliberation and prayer, made the post available to the public. None of my friends commented, but one stranger did; he said it was creepy and nonsense. Not gonna lie, it's disheartening when the only reply is a diss. It didn't hurt me personally, but the fact that this man was spitting on the love and glory of God hurt me. Remembering what I'd learned earlier, that I just need to stand aside and exalt Jesus, I decided that the best response would be Scripture. How appropriate that his question ("Where in the heck did you come up with that nonsense?") could be directly answered with a passage that included, "For the word of the cross is folly to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God"! The rest of the passage contained his answer (1 Cor. 1:18-21, 25-20), but I was pleased that I could include that perspective on what the world considers wisdom. :) After that encounter, I was reminded again of the Sermon on the Mount: "Blessed are those who are persecuted because of righteousness, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven. Blessed are you when people insult you, persecute you and falsely say all kinds of evil against you because of me." (Matt. 5:10-11)


So yeah. I'm still in awe, and still have a strong memory of what it felt like to be on Cloud 9 for most of yesterday. :) Still missing my Bible and journal, but hopefully I'll get those back on Sunday. Until then, the internet is providing me with the Scripture. Good thing I remember where all I was!! :D

(Brief sidenote: It might sound like I believe that I can do anything so long as I keep my eyes and heart on Jesus. 1) I don't think someone can actually hold that belief if they're actually focusing on Jesus. 2) That's not at all what I'm about. I believe that keeping my life fixated on my Savior and King will allow everything else to fall into place, because I will be out of the way of the Spirit's work. I understand that I will still be held responsible for my words and actions, but I now realize that I have the freedom to allow Jesus to speak through my mouth and move my hands - I don't have to carry the burden of living a righteous life, only the load of allowing Jesus to live in me and shine through me.)